Thursday, February 28, 2013

I Don't Give a QUACK, Jack.

Disclaimer: The following blog post uses "fowl" language and extreme sarcasm, but if it pisses you off, I really don't give a QUACK!

DUCK DYNASTY, probably the best thing to happen to America in along time. So if you don't know who the Duck Dynasty guys are, let me first ask, what kind of rock have you been living under?

Well the other night, I was watching Jimmy Kimmel, and Jimmy said that Morrisey (I guess he is a singer of some sort), would not be his musical guest for the night. Morrisey is a vegan animal activist, and he was appalled by the fact that he would be on a show with the Duck Dynasty gang, calling them "serial animal killers" and he said it would ruin his reputation.  So Morrisey told Kimmel it was either him or the duck killers. Well SHOCKER, the boys with guns won!

But the gang felt somewhat bad about the whole situation and felt they could do a little better job with their vegan friends....

So, now for my sermon.  I understand that we all have different views about all aspects of life.  But here is a little tip, if someone doesn't have the same view as you, who gives a QUACK! Mr. Morrisey, I am happy for you that you find ALL animals so beautiful and purpose filled that you choose not to eat them, but I however, prefer to slap animals that were created for consumption between two pieces of bread with a little BBQ sauce.

I don't get why people feel that if someone doesn't agree with what they believe, they feel they have the right to sensor others into making the same choice as them. It doesn't work that way people.

So in closing, Mr. Morrisey, thank you for being passionate about what you believe, but shut the QUACK up and let these guys do what they do.  You don't see them throwing a hissy fit because they were going to be on  a show with a "serial vegetable murderer" do you? Now sit down, chill out, grab a hamburger (well for you Mr. Morrisey maybe just the bun), and watch this great show about a faith filled family who works hard and plays even harder!

...that's what she said

Monday, February 4, 2013

So God Made A Farmer..."The Rest of the Story"

And on the 8th day, God looked down on his planned paradise and said, "I need a caretaker." So God made a farmer.
Never in my life have I had a heart stopping moment during a TV commercial. And last night, I can most certainly say that living rooms all around the country went “hush” during the “So God Made A Farmer” Dodge Ram commercial. I know that mine sure did. Every time I hear that moving poem, I get this “fluffy happy” feeling in my stomach and almost a tear in my eye. Seeing such purity on the TV screen after watching and hearing the awkwardness that was the Go Daddy creepy make out session is extremely refreshing. 
"Somebody who'd bale a family together with the soft strong bonds of sharing, who would laugh and then sigh, and then reply, with smiling eyes, when his son says he wants to spend his life 'doing what dad does.'" So God made a farmer.
But before you begin to bow down to the great Mr. Paul Harvey, “Here’s the rest of the story”…

Paul Harvey, was anti-animal agriculture. He was a closet animal rights zealot. The following is taken directly from the HSUS website:


“Some animal advocates may not be aware that Paul and Angel were two of the best friends that the animal protection movement and The HSUS ever had, and the same must be said of their surviving son, Paul Harvey Jr. This triumvirate supported the work of our organization on countless fronts, with the support from the elder Harveys dating back to the nascent days of the organization in the mid-1950s and continuing through our work today. In one way or another, they worked with all of the six CEOs of The HSUS since the group’s founding in 1954.”

Now this may come as a shock to a majority of us ag-nerds out there who use to praise that deep god like voice that would bellow over the rural radio waves with his long dramatic pauses and his legendary “good day!” sign off.  Trust me, I felt betrayed almost; I couldn’t sleep so that is why I am writing this at 1am. 

I have been seeing a lot of huf and puf about whether or not agriculture should like having Paul Harvey promote the American way of agriculture and also the National FFA Organization. Well here is my thought,

WHY ARE WE COMPLAINING ABOUT HAVING THE MOST EXPENSIVE TWO MINUTES ON TV MONEY CAN BUY, BEING SPENT PROMOTING AMERICAN FARMERS! (Major props to you Dodge! I always knew I had a soft spot for you somewhere deep inside my Chevy roots)
"I need somebody with arms strong enough to rustle a calf and yet gentle enough to deliver his own grandchild. Somebody to call hogs, tame cantankerous machinery, come home hungry, have to wait lunch until his wife's done feeding visiting ladies and tell the ladies to be sure and come back real soon -- and mean it." So God made a farmer.
We are seriously shooting ourselves in the foot right now people. This commercial ranked in the top five favorite commercials of the night and #SoGodMadeAFarmer was trending on twitter immediately after the airing. On a night when people are usually talking about Budweiser, Doritos, Beyonce forgetting to put her pants on, and Jim Harbaugh unplugging the Super Dome lights because he couldn’t beat his brother, people were talking about farmers and thinking about where their food comes from. Viewers were not concerned with the hidden agenda of the voice reciting the poem; they were listening to the words and getting lost in the images on the screen. People who have never even thought about the life of a farmer got to see real life people working hard to create a healthy wholesome product to nourish our nation. Now don’t get me wrong, my praise for Mr. Harvey has definitely been suppressed to some extent, but to each their own I guess. But in my opinion, agriculture most definitely won last night. 

...that's what she said
FYI: Paul Harvey did not write the poem "So God Made A Farmer", yes he did recite it at the FFA Convention in 1978, but the author is unknown. Also, go watch the commercial, because every time you do Dodge will donate money, up to $1 Million to the National FFA Organization.


And on the 8th day, God looked down on his planned paradise and said, "I need a caretaker." So God made a farmer. 

God said, "I need somebody willing to get up before dawn, milk cows, work all day in the fields, milk cows again, eat supper and then go to town and stay past midnight at a meeting of the school board." So God made a farmer. 

"I need somebody with arms strong enough to rustle a calf and yet gentle enough to deliver his own grandchild. Somebody to call hogs, tame cantankerous machinery, come home hungry, have to wait lunch until his wife's done feeding visiting ladies and tell the ladies to be sure and come back real soon -- and mean it." So God made a farmer. 

God said, "I need somebody willing to sit up all night with a newborn colt. And watch it die. Then dry his eyes and say, 'Maybe next year.' I need somebody who can shape an ax handle from a persimmon sprout, shoe a horse with a hunk of car tire, who can make harness out of haywire, feed sacks and shoe scraps. And who, planting time and harvest season, will finish his forty-hour week by Tuesday noon, then, pain'n from 'tractor back,' put in another seventy-two hours." So God made a farmer. 

God had to have somebody willing to ride the ruts at double speed to get the hay in ahead of the rain clouds and yet stop in mid-field and race to help when he sees the first smoke from a neighbor's place. So God made a farmer. 

God said, "I need somebody strong enough to clear trees and heave bails, yet gentle enough to tame lambs and wean pigs and tend the pink-combed pullets, who will stop his mower for an hour to splint the broken leg of a meadow lark. It had to be somebody who'd plow deep and straight and not cut corners. Somebody to seed, weed, feed, breed and rake and disc and plow and plant and tie the fleece and strain the milk and replenish the self-feeder and finish a hard week's work with a five-mile drive to church. 

"Somebody who'd bale a family together with the soft strong bonds of sharing, who would laugh and then sigh, and then reply, with smiling eyes, when his son says he wants to spend his life 'doing what dad does.'" So God made a farmer.